David Feherty's Mailbag

David Feherty
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If you have a question for David Feherty, e-mail him at feherty@golf.com

Dear David,
Slow play on TV is getting absolutely ridiculous, and as much as I hate to say it, I'm starting to get interested in NASCAR! At least they go around in circles at 180 mph! — J.J. Green, Grand Island, NE

JJ:
I've flown over Nebraska; there's no water there. How can there be a Grand Island? What is it, an area with no corn?

I can't argue with you; slow play is a scourge. Funny thing, though, is that we always seem to be able to end things pretty close to 6 o'clock on Saturday and Sunday evenings. Maybe not so much on Thursday and Friday, but the people watching during the week are, demographically speaking, golf's geldings. Having said that, NASCAR's fans, however loyal, are a couple of notches below that bunch. Their entire net worth is stuffed in the Jack Daniels bottle back at the trailer. Golf's biggest sponsors are Wachovia and Buick; NASCAR has a box of Tide.

Until the PGA Tour, which by the way is owned and administered by the players, decides to get tough on offenders, I'm afraid things won't improve. Besides, it's sometimes entertaining to watch Rory Sabbatini spiral off like a stinger missile heading for a Huey.

Dear David,
As a huge Phil Mickelson fan, I was especially glued to my TV during the CBS coverage of the Nissan Open — I mean Northern Trust Open. As always, your commentary was both brilliant and eloquent. I saw a lot of Jeff Quinney, who I feel is on his way to career victory number one this season. After a little thought, my friend and I have come up with what we think is a fitting name for the young ASU grad: Pooh Bear. Like Winnie the Pooh, but without the Winnie. I think you should consider dropping this on the air next time he plays on the weekend. — Brian The Business Karleskind

Brian:
"The Business," huh? OK. Usually that's the kind of thing that demands explanation, but the more I think about the possibilities, the less I want to know.

I think you're right about Jeff being on the verge of a win. He shows a lot of promise. He's 6 feet tall and 190 pounds, so I'm not so sure about the Pooh Bear thing. He's does have a nice rack on him though. Maybe we could call him "Dolly" Quinney, or Quinney the Pooh?

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