Quail Valley Golf Club
Vero Beach, Fla.
The course here is long and windy, with water everywhere it's the perfect setup for a middle-aged hacker with a bad back. The course is also located in a very beautiful setting, which is especially helpful when you hit the ball as erratically as I do. Among the therapeutic distractions available at Quail Valley are actual quails, bald eagles and some seriously beefy alligators. Personally, I'd like to see more snakes on the back nine, but I can't seem to get the membership fired up about that.
Carl Hiaasen is the author of The Downhill Lie: A Hacker's Return to a Ruinous Sport.