1. Steve Williams. Yes, the gloating was a bit gauche, but it’s impossible to imagine a more satisfying scenario for this polarizing looper. It can’t be an accident that Williams’s players have won 145 times, and while it was a violation of the caddie code, you have to admire the brutal honesty in the critique of his onetime best man.
2. Adam Scott. We’re so anxious to mint a new star, how about this old standby, who looks like a movie star, swings like the young Tiger and has that most precious commodity in sports: class. A win at this week’s PGA would be huge for Scott … and golf.
3. Suzann Pettersen. The super-talented, maddeningly enigmatic Nordic god went 63-64 on the weekend to take the Ladies Irish Open. It’s amazing how easy Pettersen can make the game look, and, a little too often, how difficult.
4. Holly Sweeney. Rory’s ex-girlfriend has landed a modeling contract. After carefully studying her bountiful charms in this photo, it is my professional opinion that Rory might consider a mulligan.
5. Pat Perez. Hey, the dude has a boxing glove for a headcover. He’s always run hot. At least after blowing off a couple of kids, he’s trying hard to make amends, offering public apologies and searching for the aggrieved kid by way of Twitter so he can lavish a few gifts. You gotta like the effort.
1. Pat Perez. On the other hand, his behavior was “unprofessional” and a “dick move.” Those are his words, not mine!
2. Atlanta. It’s too hot to be hot.
3. Phil Mickelson. For the first two rounds of the PGA, he has to play with David Toms, the dude who broke his heart 10 years ago at the same course, and Vijay Singh, a long-standing nemesis. Even Phil’s plasticy perma-grin will have trouble making it through those two days.
4. Tiger Woods. He can’t hit a fairway to save his life. He’s fiddling with putters like a latter-day Sergio. He’s got some funkiness growing on his chin. Another big-money sponsor has walked. And now he’s been utterly upstaged by, of all things, a caddie. It can’t get any worse. Can it?
5. Ryo Ishikawa. I love everything about this kid but, in prime position to get his first U.S. win at Firestone, he made way too many mistakes on Sunday, getting run over by Scott in the final pairing. And the excuse that Ryo is only a teenager is only going to be good for another month.