Feherty's Mailbag

Feherty’s Mailbag

If you’ve ever wanted to send David Feherty a question or comment, here’s your chance! David is putting down his mike to answer your E-mails in his mailbag column for GOLFONLINE.

Click here to send him your best question or comment.(Note: Letters may be edited for clarity and length).

Hi D: What’s with the fancy goatee? Your shaver break? Why don’t you play anymore? I seem to remember you challenging back in the day. Didn’t you even win one? It’d be great to see you and McCord coming down the 18th tied for the U.S. Senior Open. Oops, are you even 50? Last question. Why doesn’t the PGA allow a more relaxed dress code? You know how gross it is to watch guys sweating like Shaq walk around my television screen? Yettch! How about nice dress shorts like the ladies wear? I bet the scores would even go lower with more comfortable attire. Take it easy. Love your ironic insight.
— Fred Rogger, British Columbia, Canada

Have you considered decaf? And don’t address me as “D.” Where do you live, in the bar scene from “Star Wars”? To answer your questions in order, the goatee hides one of my chins, I hate golf, I won 10, and the reason no one takes the U.S. Amateur seriously is because they’re allowed to wear shorts. It looks like a high school event. Go get a bunch of paper towels and then imagine John Daly in a nice pair of dress shorts like the ladies wear. Yettch!

David, Now that John Daly has finally won again, do you think that he can win again this year? I have always been a big fan of John ever since he won the PGA Championship. Please express your thoughts.
— Bart Wynn, Doha, Qatar

How do you pronounce Qatar? Is it like when you hock a lugee? John is the best. Everybody knows he’s had his problems and still has a few to work out. It’s amazing how much things in the rest of your life improve when you’re playing well. Unfortunately, he still makes the occasional mistake, like a couple of weeks ago when he put a headcover on Charlie Howell and tried to put him back in his golf bag.

Great Book!!! How do write with your kids around, not to mention She Who Must be Obeyed?
— Chris Ehlen, Maple Plain, MN

Thank you. Which book? The kids are in school and Anita loves it when I’m writing. It means two things; one, I’m home and two, I’m not pestering her with weird requests that she put on some costume so we can play the aggressive cheerleader and the reluctant quarterback.

I enjoy your column and commentary — you have a great vocabulary and solid writing style. Having said that, I understand that you walked out of school at age 17, and your game benefited, I believe. My question is, did you ever go back and finish your education, and if so, where and when? If you quit school to better prepare for your golfing career, wouldn’t it make sense to finish school to better prepare you for your current one?
— Derek, Charlotte, NC

Derek: What a great name. I always wanted to be named after something made with girders and I-beams and stuff. Did my Dad put you up to this? No, I did NOT finish my formal education. You have a problem with that, huh? If I’ve done as well as I have without an education, how much better could I have done with one? Not much, I think. I’m not against education, I just knew what I wanted to do and did it. When I was 28, my Dad asked me if I was ever going to go back to and get a degree. I said it would take five or six years and what the hell was the point of having a degree at that age? He said, “Well, how old will you be in five or six years if you don’t get a degree?” The problem is, I’m not educated enough to understand what he meant.

Normally when the clubhead strikes the ball, where should my waist/legs be? Facing the ball or already turning towards the target? What about my hands — in front or behind the ball?
— Mark, Marietta, GA

Good God Mark, your swing must look like a strand of DNA! When the clubhead strikes the ball, it would be preferable if your waist and legs were still below your manly breasts, and at no time should your hands leave your wrists. However, your feet may occasionally disconnect from your ankles, but this is normal, and should be expected from time to time. It worries me that you don’t seem to give a monkey’s fart where your tongue is during this aberration. Where do you usually have it, molars, incisors, canine? Just have a lash at it, my boy, you’re thinking way too much.


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