Golfer’s Glossary: A golfers-only dictionary

The Golfer's Glossary

At GOLF.com we’ve been collecting new words we hear on the course and compiling them in our “Golfer’s Glossary.” We need your help. Please tweet your glossary suggestions to @GOLF_com. If your word is picked for the Golfer’s Glossary, you could win a prize. Thanks!

Golfers Glossay-A-Snowman

A

Abominable Snowman (pictured above) noun a nine on your scorecard, worse than a snowman ‘8’

Afraid of the Dark adj. a putt that won’t go in the hole

Aiming Fluid noun beer

Alec Guinness noun a shot that’s O.B. Wan Kenobi

Amelia Earhart noun a tee shot that looks great taking off and then just disappears

Army Golf noun when your tee shots go left, right, left

Golfers Glossary-B-Beagle

B

Beagle noun when you hit a par 5 in two or drive a par 4 — and then three-putt. You’ve missed your eagle, blown the birdie, feel like you’ve made a bogey, and end up with a dog of a par.

Bernie Madoff noun a great lie and a lot of green to work with

Botox noun an unfortunate lip-out

Golfer's Glossary-C-Captain Kirk

Good luck finding a “Captain Kirk.”

C

Carl noun course superintendent, inspired by Carl Spackler, from Caddyshack

Captain Kirk noun a wayward shot that goes where no ball has ever gone before

Christmas Present noun a ball that lands under a tree

Concheat verb to concede a putt that your buddy has no chance of making in exchange for him conceding a putt that you have no chance of making (e.g., “He concheated the breaking 6-footer”)

Condie noun making par after bouncing your drive off a fairway home (e.g., “His drive hit that condominium, but he still made par”)

Cuban Putt noun putt that stopped just short of the hole (i.e., needed one more revolution)

Danny DeVitoD

Daisy Duke noun a shot that is a thing of beauty from out of the hazard

Danny DeVito noun a nasty little 5-footer

Dick Van Patten noun picking up your ball when “eight is enough”

Dollar Menu noun a guy who shortchanges his caddie


E

Elephant’s A—— noun a drive that’s high and stinky


G

Get the Waitress verb telling your approach shot to “Check, please!”

Green Monster noun someone who gets belligerent on the course

Green With Implants noun false front


H

Harrison Ford noun when you blade a simple chip and it becomes a runner. Blade. Runner.

Golfer's Glossary, Ulysses by James Joyce

There’s nothing simple about a James Joyce.


J

James Joyce noun a putt that’s impossible to read

Jose Maria noun time to reload (i.e, “I loth a ball”)


L

Lardage noun yardage you give when your buddy’s been hitting his shots fat (i.e., you find the yardage, add 10-20 yards to it and give him the “lardage”)

Laurel and Hardy noun following a thin shot with a fat one

Luca Brasi noun wayward tee shot that now sleeps with the fishes


M

Marlboro Country noun where wayward drives land

Men’s Warehouse noun when your partner sticks his approach (i.e., “You’re going to like the way you look”)

Milk Carton noun a tee shot that goes missing in the woods

Mother-in-Law noun a shot that looked good leaving

Mulligone noun a mulligan that’s worse than the first one

O

Ocho Stinko noun scoring an 8 on a hole

O.J. Simpson verb getting away with one


P

Pete Rose Haircut noun divot out of the rough

Press Secretary noun the guy in your foursome who keeps track of bets

Pole Dancer noun a shot that hits the flagstick

Popeye noun a shot with some extra backspin, or “spin-age”


R

Run a Red Light verb pounding a putt way past the hole

Golfer's Glossary - Sammy Hagar

Sammy Hagar doing his thing.


S

Saddam noun a ball buried and hidden in a bunker

Sammy Hagar noun the guy who fills out your foursome when a regular can’t make it

Slot-Machine Start noun 7-7-7

Son-in-Law Shot noun OK, but not quite what you had in mind
Sunken Treasure noun a ProV1 found in a water hazard


T

Toyota noun a chip or a putt that you can’t stop from rolling


U

USGA noun Ugly Shot, Go Again


V

Vijay Single noun A surly guy who joins your threesome on the first tee because nobody else wants to play with him

Glossary-W-White Castle Sliders

White Castle looks better on a plate than it does on a green.


W

Wallflower noun a ball on the edge of the green

Wild, Wild West noun when everyone makes double on a par 4—too many six-shooters

Willie Nelson noun a very high drive

White Castle Putt noun a slider