Daily Flogging: Amazing Kreskin reads Tiger's future

Monday March 8th, 2010

What's ahead for Tiger Woods? A return at Bay Hill? The Masters? Pebble Beach?
No one can say. So it made total sense that in the quest to get answers, Hank Gola of the New York Daily News reached out to... the Amazing Kreskin, now 75. You may remember Kreskin from his frequent appearances (56 of them) on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, and more recently on Late Night with David Letterman and Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. If not, as Gola wrote, The Amazing Kreskin "is to mentalists what Woods is to hackers."
If you check out Kreskin's website, by the way, you'll be greeted with this headline: "Even now, I know what you are thinking." Really? It's tacos. Now that's amazing.
The word from Kreskin via Gola:

"If there is one word, I would say 'loneliness.' I don't think he can pull out of it... We love a comeback. But in the case of Tiger Woods, I don't see the comeback as it's happened with Michael Vick. Golf, unlike football, is a pastoral sport. It's extraordinarily slow-moving. It would be impossible for any human being who knows his story to watch him play (and not) frequently reflect in that down dtime about the scandal of his life. That's not true when you're watching an exciting game... He's going to carry that with him the rest of his life.
"He is an extraordinarily disciplined person. He has to be to accomplish all that he has. Yes, I think he can certainly do this but there's a slight problem. It's sometimes a long walk to the next tee. And the faces he sees are going to trigger thoughts in his mind. It will be quite a challenge."
Kreskin is better known for his mind-reading act, which truly is amazing, than his predictions. But just for reference, here are some of Kreskin's thoughts heading into 2009:
Hillary Clinton will be seriously encouraged to run for the
Presidency in 2012. If President Barack Obama doesn't win a second
term, the cause will be Hillary Clinton.
If immense monetary bailouts continue and spread, the recession will last longer than 4 ½ years.
As our national politicians who are claiming to represent the
American people continue to put heavy restrictions and controls over
certain industries, such as the automotive industry, the lack of
insight into how to control the banking industry will result in less
and less loans for the American citizens, and the money the banks
receive being abused and used to buy other banks. The likelihood is
that by the end of Obama's first period in office, there will be less
than 6 banks in the United States.
One of the blessings that will come out of the deepening recession
will be the rebirth of mom and pop stores. This will be
counter-balanced to the disaster and the closing of many shopping malls
in the United States, or at least many of their occupants.
There will be a growing movement in the United States to follow in
the steps of England, and that is to restrict, discourage, or even ban
cell phones in restaurants.
The practice of vegetarianism will be found to be a dangerous aspect in the health of certain individuals.
While I cannot give the month and the year, it is inevitable that
the draft in the United States will be reinstated. It will be realized
by more and more Americans that the dissolving of the draft was a
gigantic mistake.
Kreskin didn't attempt to predict how long Woods will remain No. 1 in the rankings, so Gola did his own research. Woods has been No. 1 for 247 weeks, Gola wrote, and according to Ian Barker of the European Tour, Woods loses .25 average points each week he doesn't play. Woods has a 4.5-point lead over Steve Stricker.
"His average would accordingly fall to around 8.00 sometime between the U.S. Open and the (British) Open Championship if he hasn't played," Barker said.
"He is unlikely to fall from World No. 1 over the next few weeks but he
will become vulnerable as the U.S. Open approaches especially if one of
the chasers can get their average up to 9 or 10."

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