Heeeeeeere's Faldo

"Aw, crumbs!" Nick Faldo says on a balmy fall day at the Walt Disney World Resort in Orlando. "I didn't look at my brief. Sorry." He's referring to the memo his people prepared suggesting that he bring some dashing duds to his GOLF Magazine photo shoot. A crisp blazer and suede loafers, perhaps. Yet he arrives bearing only the clothes on his back: a sweaty black T and ragged jean shorts, making the urbane Brit and winner of six majors look like he's ready to fix some leaky pipes or hang drywall. But forgive the 49-year-old his forgetfulness. He's been busy. This year he's calling the shots as lead analyst both at CBS (for a reported $8 million per year) and the Golf Channel — that's some 25 Tour events and three of the four majors, including the Masters. Faldo sat down with us to talk about landing his dream job, making nice with a ticked-off Tiger, how he'll be a bellini to Johnny Miller's whiskey shot, and the secret to true happiness.

You have the most coveted television job in the game, the lead color analyst at CBS. Just how many times have you pinched yourself?

[Laughs] About 17. It all happened so fast. I was trying to get out of a little fishing boat in Ireland, the Tuesday after the Ryder Cup. It was raining, too cold to fish, and I got a call saying, "CBS has come into the picture." I literally fell down. I got my leg caught in the rope of the boat and fell. Within a week we were at CBS headquarters in New York signing the contract. That kind of thing doesn't usually happen at that speed. I'm quite humbled.

Have you started memorizing your Masters-speak? "Patrons" and "first cut," instead of "fans" and "rough"?

I'll be walking on eggshells at first. To be safe, I may not actually talk during the Masters -- I'll just use sign language. But I can't worry too much about that. Still, I hope Augusta will cut me some slack in my first year.

Are you nervous?

Yes, but in a good way. It's like golf. If you're not feeling a few butterflies, something's wrong. But I'm prepared. I know that course so well I could call the action in the dark. I'll just keep it simple: what's in a player's mind when he walks up the last fairway in a major. I'm the "how, what and why" man.

Two years ago, you were a rookie at ABC. You've gone from the mailroom to the CEO's chair. How are you preparing?

I've only played back tape a couple times, so I'll need to listen to myself more. I know I've improved a lot in two years. I used to just stop [pauses] in mid-sentence. My mannerisms have improved, but you've got to get more polished. I always try to get better. You need to know when to talk like mad, and when to stop before you say something stupid.